-
Femi Kuti Opens Up on His Unusual Childhood and Complex Relationship With Fela Kuti

Grammy-nominated Afrobeat icon Femi Kuti has shed new light on the extraordinarily unconventional relationship he shared with his father, the late Fela Anikulapo Kuti, creator of the Afrobeat genre.
Speaking at a Book Chat during the recently concluded Ake Arts and Books Festival, held from November 20 to 22 at Bon Hotel, Ikeja GRA, Lagos, Femi recounted how he grew up under an intense and unconventional upbringing.
The session, hosted by award-winning poet Dami Ajayi, focused on Mrs Kuti, the memoir of Fela’s late wife, Remilekun Kuti.
According to Femi, Fela’s expectations were extreme—he demanded excellence even without providing instruction.
“He (Fela) expected me to know how to read. How is it possible to know how to read if am not taught? If I haven’t got any formal education of any sort, how can I read? But I had to read. ‘You should know,’ he would say. ‘Did you take your brain and put it in my head?’” Femi shared.
He explained that for anyone who belonged to Fela’s inner circle, excellence was non-negotiable.
“If you are Fela’s person you had to excel beyond reasonable doubt. You just had to know. So you couldn’t give excuses. If you are somebody he is not close to, he probably would give you an opportunity to explain yourself. But people close to him, it was like, ‘Why did I have to tell you. You should know. You must be getting A in my class,’ for instance, if he was a teacher.”
Femi said he learned most things simply by observing his father, including developing the courage to live under constant threat.
“I learnt by just watching him. I would ask questions probably like ‘Are you not afraid to die?’ He would give me his answer. Because there were so many police raids, soldiers, beatings always etc. And I was living with him.”
He also recalled the confusing emotional dynamics of their home.
“And as I was growing up I would say ‘what’s wrong?’ Going to other people’s houses, children are getting along the conventional way. But if I failed, expecting a very harsh treatment, Fela would say, ‘Ah you failed, Well done.’ So I was in a big dilemma,” he revealed.
Femi’s son, Made, also an Afrobeat musicia,n joined the panel and affirmed his father’s account. He noted that even addressing Fela as “father” was not allowed.
“I don’t want to interrupt because he is being modest. Fela did not teach him music. He taught himself everything. There was no conventional father-child relationship. And also he couldn’t call his father ‘father’. Fela had this serious idea of a kind of a communist environment within his household so much so that everybody, including his children had to call him ‘Fela’.”
The conversation, rich with personal anecdotes, offered a rare glimpse into the complicated family dynamics behind one of Africa’s most influential musical dynasties a legacy built on brilliance, rebellion, and unconventional love.
